I didn’t have many expectations for Mother’s Day, I generally like to enjoy however it comes—but I did have one pre-requisite: that there be no sibling arguing.
I say this with a grin: Mother’s Day can be hard on the family when mum has a day off. It means that everyone else has to do what mum normally does for a day. Thankfully for them, it only happens once a year.
Admittedly, it was going to be a busy Mother’s Day this year, with commitments at church as well as family to pick up from the airport etc. so when I was able to sleep-in the day before for the first time in months, I was very pleased…and a little suspicious. Is God giving me extra rest today for a reason?
Sunday morning came and initially began well—then not so well. A trigger from one child sent another one of my children off like a train, letting off steam with all passion! As I slipped out of the room to find a quiet space, I noticed in the laundry that my washing machine was flashing ‘F3’ at me. It had come off it’s hinges due to a broken suspension and the dirty washing was already piling up in the bucket. As you can imagine, that’s not good news for a family of six.
Happy Mother’s Day!
The beginning tone set for the day meant we didn’t get the annual family photo, there were lesser ‘hallmark’ moments, and as I scrolled through social media throughout the day looking at the beautiful family mother’s day photos of my friends, mine was unfortunately not to be one of them. Though the remainder of my well-meaning children scurried to pull together whatever was left of the day, it began to improve but my request for no arguing had long since gone out the window.
You had one job
While not everything in life is meant to be easy, I was hopeful that the one day of the year meant to be my day off, would be just that. It ended up, however, requiring more mothering skills and calmness from me than usual, while also fighting off the temptation to feel sorry for myself.
Though the day wasn’t perfect, it was real. Families are not always picture perfect, they are not always “insta-worthy”, and special days don’t always run as planned. Families are however, a gathering of different personalities that often compliment each other, but can also clash. It can be messy, it can be loud, but it can also be so much fun.
What’s wonderful is that families are all in it together and despite differences, whether it be a clash of wills, stubbornness or tiredness, the love doesn’t have to change, it just needs to bear with each other.
My children know that in this house they are safe, they belong, and are loved even with their imperfections—especially in their imperfections, because we all have them. They know that even when we fail or make mistakes, it doesn’t affect our love for each other, though a little gentle shaping may be in order.
We are safe, we belong and we are loved
Often we don’t meet up to our own expectations and though we may have the best intentions, sometimes we mess up. Even when we feel like we’ve failed God, here in His love we are safe, we belong and we are loved, but we are also shaped. Proverbs chapter 3 verse 12 says: ‘…the Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.’
When God redirects us and gives us a nudge in the right direction, sometimes the nudge is uncomfortable, but he loves us enough to show us. He never rejects us, but in our imperfections, He still lavishes His love on us.
‘Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.’ —Colossians chapter 3 verses 12-15
For all the mums out there who spent mother’s day looking for a silver lining, I just want to say thank you for loving your family through the glory days and the not-so-glory days. And hey…there’s always next year!
Rebecca Moore 2018 ©